Is that common for single dads?) If we wanted to genuinely meet me, then he should invest the time, or else, Ill pass (I said all those things nicely and with diplomacy)! Hahaha. But it works. We have text a lot, and he really doesnt live that far from me. So i matched with a guy on tinder, he only had one picture and his bio was pretty bare but we hit it off in messages and decided to exchange numbers. I dont think you have anything to lose by messaging her. Im worried :/ I message him again. I matched with a guy on online dating. I have no idea what hes thinking. I didnt hear from him for almost a week and then he sent me a message asking if I forgot him. 1) If he was that interested in you, he would actually arrange with you to meet in person, particularly as hes so shy to show you his face. I changed the subject right away by asking him how his birthday was going. We texted from sun up until after 1 am everyday. Hes asked to take it slow and be patient as he has been traveling but how do I know if hes blowing me off or honest. One so I can hear his voice, 2 to get immediate responses from questions and 3 to see if we can see each other in person eventually. This isnt the 1950s when you couldnt call a man. I said ok for Tuesday. I proceeded to give him my cell and we starting texting. I feel pressured into responding politely when Im really not enjoying the exchange. They have many, many uses, and not just for guys. Last couple he read but ignored. How do I proceed without scaring him away more?! Am I wasting my time? It happens a lot so I wouldnt take it too personal. (Note we are older I am 64 and he is 69. Sorry he isnt worth my time, and what you said proves that he is bored and wants me to entertain him until his other person is in contact with him. If you cant connect or dont hear back, you have your answer. He has also called me his wife. He asked me when would be another time to meet and I told him my availability. Im not sure if my situation is just text book or if there is something there with this guy. Self love is riding high today! After about a week, we were texting and finding out more about each other. Wondering where you stand is not something to be ashamed of, Della Casa stresses. I have a client who because of COVID has been video dating with a man for 4 months. He did pick up the phone he is putting his dog down. I met this guy two weeks ago on a dating app. Since we are friends in real life, we met up (just both of us) to discuss about school stuff. Him: Hi! When he calls and asks you out, THAT is what counts. I told him that I wanted to meet and it was on him. It was interesting and the fact is, I would like to meet with him to see what he is like and if we could at least date. So, no more of this, for me. He makes an effort to spend time with you. He drove to my area (20minute drive) for drinks and it was lovely. We unfortunately started everything from a distance so we rely heavily on texting and I get him to give a once a week phone call. I stopped answering and she texted me the next day and conversation continued, and asked her if this day during the week worked. Not because he sent a dumb text he probably just wanted to let you know he was thinking about you and was obviously unaware of your rule. G'luck! But if hes in the shes nice I might ask her out again stage he wont. Good for you, Amelia. I dont really date much. Bp, What about scammers? So met this woman online, we exchange few emails and at about the same time I was to go away for a week and told her when I get back we can plan to meet. Bp. I wouldnt trust this or him. and phone call sometimes wont be answered but will call me 45,mins to a hour later one time his other line was ringing at 2 am he claimed he didnt know the number this was the second time that happen iam i over thinking or overreacting i did say something about the wAy he has been alittle distance at time esp when he go pick up his children or he has to do this or that that deal with the kids mother he claimed the been broken up for 2 years i think its been shorter than that ..now hes been ignoring my texts and phone call maybe my approach was wrong or hes mad because i figured him out or the situation i. did have a. feeling that something was stopping him from getting closer to me ..he didnt really flirt much with me or say anything much sexual either he will tell me that i look pretty or nice on the date but he was a huge fan of kissing never aggressive never inquired about coming to my home or me coming to his home something just didnt seem right I was just thinking maybe he was just a different guy or something was just stopping him from getting close to me maybe he could still be seeing the kids mother or he had someone please help me very confused now we havent spoken in like 2 days when I confronted him about the way he had been acting lately the distance and the text messages and the phone calls hes so upset I guess he doesnt want to talk to me anymore and then I figure him out. I dont reply. It became obvious to the group that he and I spoke to each other more often and we would always end up seperated from everyone else. But if there is no actual in-person contact beware! I met this guy on a Saturday night, I was out clubbing with my friends and he happened to be in the same place I was. Sherry , youre absolutely right, I cant stand texting, would much rather hear your voice and hear your texts . I do feel a little down as I didnt hear from him. I would prefer an invitation for a nice dinner, glass of wine and conversation somewhere quiet with a nice ambience to get to know each other better and see how the chemistry feels! We had talked on the phone only 4 different times , he said he loved my voice but later told me he did not like to talk on the phone so we did not. Bp. Hes either just being a flake or chickening out. Hugs, Bp. After a week or so, i texted him back and asked why he disappeared. If not, thats okay. The evening of the 3rd date he was running late at work. At the end of the conversation he told me his cat is sick and he needed to take her to the vet the next day and it was causing a lot of stress/emotions. This went in for a week. It sounded like a classic rebound but as I kind of liked him and had no expectations I decided to meet him. Bp. So I get LOTS of messages from guys who dont live here. Here are a few signs that he's doing the slow fade: He's distant during sex and leaves as soon as he can afterward. I attempted to see if he should move on with a single friend but he didnt want to. So you ask him to text you which you should have asked him to call. Move on to a man who is interested in getting to know you and who doesnt play games. or should i give it a try? It all happened over 40 years ago and Ive been to counseling its hard for me to figure that thats still somehow affects the way I interact with men. I really dont want to met a man for coffee if I have no idea who he is. I read their profile. Chad, it sounds like she isnt comfortable spending time alone with you yet. The truth is Im a shy and reserve woman. See how he responds. And just for the records, when I saw him we did share our thoughts and involvement in social media, which isnt a LOT. I sort of gave him a maybe. (I could see it when we first became friends on Facebook) But when Van showed me the post it was nothing that he had to hide from me. He followed with I miss ya. I fumed and texted, the next day, well, you have my number haha. So we met up for coffee one evening and talked for hours. And he seemed nice and all. You asked for what you wanted and he basically is saying nope, wont do it. When a man is truly interested and looking for a real relationship you dont have to pressure him. This guy I was talking to was living overseas away from his family, pursuing his passion, and truthfully not out there dating a bunch of women just to date. I have asked her for her phone number, but she refuses to give it to me. We have seen each other probably twice since that text reveal but still no real conversation afterwards. Hello Bobbi, thank you so very much for this thoughtful article. I love the pic! I met a guy at workhe is my teammateI kind of like him (have never dated) he does hv the qualities I would prefer.and we text a he lot about everything frm ourselves to our families.he also did take my side during issues wich cropped up at office . Cmon. He said How are you darling? I didnt respond, because I had told him earlier in the week that if I felt like he wasnt putting in any effort, I would eventually just quit responding. This person wasnt here, and you can only be so obnoxious on social media, right? Though I do want to start talking on the phone. Hes excited to meet in person. The last almost week now he has been more sporadic with his texts and I dont know if hes lost interest or if hes just busy. Ask him about his life. Hes a very busy guy who lives almost 2 hours away (distance was the reason we didnt date the last go around) and has a teenage son living at home and he is finishing up a college degree. Yep. Thank you so much you really answer lots of my doubts about texting. He shows signs through body language and speaking to me differently than others. Youre thinking there is no one else. While doing this you leave too many variables open as in: Him pretending he's someone he's not. Left me unread for 3 weeks. The magic came from sharing values, sharing vibes, sharing energy. You should only text a girl every day if you're already sleeping together a lot or are boyfriend and girlfriend, or at least friends with benefits. Good luck. We still wanted to meet in person and now that Ive thrown it out there he has not replied. We received your msg btw and will respond soon. I thought we clicked but the next day he never texted, that night he posted on Facebook his cell stopped working and thats why he couldnt contact anyone But today I messaged him a happy new year, he replied it back but thats it No personal message. Period. As I didnt get anything back from my last text I decided to stop. Ive seen countless women create completefantasies and get drawn in often before they even meet a man. Advice? Ask if he is and just accept the answer. Can we get over that :/ dated, dinners, 3-4 times a week, A lot of texting. If theyre canceling dates and texting less, theyre likely pulling away or exploring their options, she says. I ghosted two actually because I determined that they were misrepresenting themselves on the dating app. One day when I was in his apartment and enjoyed his cocktails I was totally drunk then we had sex then. Its made me feel a little crap because he never actually gave me the time of day in the end to meet me and then throws in the lets be friends to maybe keep me on the wings as a just in case option??. I am assuming that is why they are on a dating website. Is he willing to do that? They need to know you can and will have time for them. You know, like a grownup. He planned it all. He's more comfortable virtually. I thought I was doing something wrong but now I know. So expect when you meet this type - he WILL pull back after he reveals his feelings to you - how far and for how long remains to be seen and is a little harder to predict but it will happen. Oke, that might have been Covid, so we had to cancel our date, but he texted he really hoped I still wanted to see him after my skiing trip, which started the next day. I like to keep this dating game with him but am I missing something? What do you know, a week later, he accused me of feeling more for him than him feeling for me?! Hi Jojo. Who doesn't crave that little thrill you get from seeing a message from them pop up on your screen, knowing they are thinking of you and wanting to connect? So when he can meet I cant because children activities, weekend is out of question obviously. During your road trip Id have a grownup conversation with him about whether hes looking for the same thing you are. Promises dont count. Let him show HIS interest and act like a gentleman, Gennell. I consider him as a friend from a distance. | No reproductions or copying without credit or permission. Youre right: its going nowhere. We can chat then in person. I am the one who has to initiate everything, so it getting a little tired. A phone call that lasted 3.0 hours long. Congratulations! I said no, come down if you want. Facetime. He says how busy he is and how hed really love to see you soon. xo, KK: Yup, youre overthinking. He calls me with endearments and sometimes talk like we are in a relationship. Move on. Get hold of yourself and end this so you have the time and emotional energy to engage with a man with real potential. I am waiting for him to tell me if he wanna go with me but he didnt. He has two kids by the way. This has been for 4 months. I honestly dont know the answer. 3) How can he seriously expect any type of relationship to develop with a paper bag constantly on his head? Now I know not to share anything personal and that I dont want repeated. We clicked straight away and chatted lots and discovered we had lots in common. -Bp. So basically, I am not sure what I can do right now. Im sorry for this long story but Im really curious what you think of this. Hi! But he said I need to wait for a month because he is in his hometown and the person who raised him just died. Were both in our mid 40s, single and do get along pretty well. It sucks. He always treats me so gently and sweet. Do I ask for a second one? Bp, I been dating this guy for over two weeks and hes and nice guy and things seemed good with us we had plans for this weekend but he had to work but he hasnt text me back yet now I am not sure what to do. We would text flirt but then he took it a bit further telling me his fantasies about me.